They just ain't cool

One of the most poignant characteristics of the conservative movement is the extent to which they deeply yearn to be cool and yet are inescapably uncool on the most fundamental level. From their “conservative Woodstock” obsession to their sad attachment to Ted Nugent, the rare remnant of ’60s rock ‘n’ roll who will have anything to do with them, they continue to insist that they are the true counterculture, the real rebels with a real cause. It’s just sad. With age should come wisdom, but unfortunately Republicans are still living with their faces pressed against the glass, wistfully yearning to join the party...